Advice for the newly single
(Also check out our dating articles section)

There's no doubt about it, the end of a relationship is an extremely traumatic affair. It represents a huge change in one's life, not to mention the hurt and pain. Like all traumatic events, time will make things better but there are things that you can do to make it easier. Here is a list of things to consider doing:

• Write a list of all the negative aspects of the relationship you can think of and keep it by your bed. Look at it every morning to start your day feeling glad that you're out of it
• Learn to appreciate being single....look at friends or colleagues in bad relationships and feel glad that you are in charge of your own destiny without compromise
• Change your bedroom or even redecorate the house to remove old memories and signify a new start
• If you've been thinking about buying a new car, now is the time to get it...pamper yourself
• Pay particular attention to your appearance...feeling good on the outside will help you feel good on the inside
• Give yourself realistic goals to achieve
• There will of course be times when you feel dreadful about the whole thing...tell yourself that it's just a temporary blip and it won't interfere with your new life plan
• Take time to consider what went wrong in the relationship, reflect on it and use this knowledge to understand better how not to let it happen again.
• Try not to get consumed with hate, blame or guilt. Negative emotions like this will really drag you down. However difficult it may be, forgiveness will allow you to grow much better
• Finally, consider this situation as an ideal opportunity to audit your life and get everything in order. Imagine the person you really want to be and work towards being that person secure in the knowledge you will be a much better, well rounded person and above all an excellent catch for your next partner
   

First Date Advice
(Also check out our dating articles section)

What to do...Dinner, Movie ??

In most cases, you can't go wrong with a romantic dinner. Although the cinema is a traditional choice, there is virtually no intimacy or romantic atmosphere as you are both having to concentrate on a film rather than on each other. Generally the idea of the first date is to get to know each other better and perhaps more intimately. There's no doubt about it, having dinner with someone is a pretty intimate experience and it may be daunting to have to sit in front of someone you don't really know for a couple of hours and eat in front of them whilst maintaining a smooth flowing conversation! The truth is it will nearly always be better than you imagined providing you follow some fairly basic rules.

GUYS: (Conversation)

• Ask her about her work, goals and desires
• Listen to her I repeat... Listen to her
• Compliment her on how she looks and especially compliment her shoes...she probably spent ages getting ready and will really appreciate it.
• Listen out for any similarities you may have so you form a 'queue' of things to discuss when appropriate
• Keep a mental list of easy to discuss subjects such as favourite movies, food types, music
• Try and find out about her views and values before openly displaying yours
• Give her centre stage first...find out as much as you can about her...be interested in her life and resist the temptation to talk about yours too much initially
• Don't bullshit about things

GUYS (Physical Stuff)

• Don't stare at her breasts...no matter how appealing they look!
• Generally, if the date is going well, you'll both be mentally aware of it and you will know the appropriate time to make a more physical move
• Give good, confident eye contact

What to eat

This is generally up to how comfortable you feel. So many dishes come with garlic that it is almost impossible to avoid and it really isn't a huge issue.
It may be better to avoid ordering something that will be really messy and difficult to eat, such as lobster.

Paying the Bill

Always a difficult moment, but on a first date, always offer to pick up the bill...after all, you invited her out. She may well offer to contribute which is fine.